Dreaaaaaam, Dream, Dream, Dream

3 Jun

Rarely do I remember a dream. I’m the kind of sleeper that is out until the morning (well, unless I hear the telling gag of my dog upchucking a fur ball and goodness, I go from a dead sleep to out of bed in nothing flat… sorry, TMI) but otherwise, once I’ve hit REM, I remember nothing.

Recently I’ve been having the kinds of dreams you wake up from and the only thing you can say is, “What the eff was that?”

Dream #1 – I am at a dinner party and realize that I am the only one there that does not have a date or significant other. While I’m trying to come up with a master plan to escape out the bathroom window to avoid the knowing glances at the empty chair to my left, a man sits down next to me. The man: Edward Cullen. I find this slightly ironic seeing as, according to Stephenie Meyer, his brand of vampire does not eat food.

Conclusion: I would rather risk the chance of having my blood sucked than be dateless to a function.

Dream #2 – I am a professional dancer on Dancing with the Stars and David Cook (sigh) is my celebrity partner and while everyone else is wearing the flamboyant glitz and glitter that is oh so popular on the show, we are dressed like giant birds and dancing to the Chicken Dance song.

Conclusion: I have an unhealthy infatuation with a celebrity and should stop watching So You Think You Can Dance right before I go to bed.

Dream #3 – In this dream, I find myself in a high school auditorium watching a terrible production of “Our Town.” The next thing I know, I’m standing on my seat hurling what I can only imagine must be a homemade Molotov cocktail onto the stage sitting the place a-blaze.

Conclusion: I should probably check myself into a mental institute or at least an anger management course.

Like I said, “What the eff?”

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One Response to “Dreaaaaaam, Dream, Dream, Dream”

  1. leslie June 4, 2009 at 8:21 am #

    You say what the eff…I say THAT IS EFFING AMAZING!!!! I think you need to work on remembering you dreams more often!

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